If you want to build a habit that actually lasts, the answer is usually less exciting than you hope. You do not start with something bold or impressive. You start with something so small it feels almost too easy to count.
How to Build a Habit Without Making It Too Hard
Why does size matter so much? The bigger the intended habit, the more likely it fails. You help a plant grow by watering it a little every day, but you will kill it if you toss it in a swimming pool.
The problem is that many people think too much about the end result. They decide they want to achieve some big lofty goal, and they set a base habit to get there. You’ll hear things like “I’m going to quit coffee,” or “I’m going to go to the gym every day.”
They must think they’re high-end sports cars with plans like that. Why start small when they can go zero to sixty in one second?
Some people even think they’re doing it more gradually, but even then they often are shooting for the stars. They’re going to run a marathon in a few months, and that gives them plenty of time to train! But, they plan intense runs multiple times a week to get there. That’s still the sports car attitude.
Want to know a trick that really helps? Start small. Like, really small.
Think of these common goals:
- Get in shape: Don’t plan to go to the gym every day. Instead, try to do one minute of exercise at home every day. Or even just one pushup.
- Quit coffee: Don’t just give it up. Try leaving the last sip in each cup. Eventually, you’ll start pouring out half without even realizing it.
- Run a marathon: Just plan to run. Find somewhere easy (a flight of stairs at home, a hallway in your apartment building, etc.) and do a light jog each time you’re there.
It doesn’t mean you can’t aim for the big goals. You can still go to the gym or grab a water instead of a coffee, just avoid making those your foundational goal.
The point is that you do something really small, so that you don’t have any excuse not to. There are two big reasons why new habits often don’t stick:
- They’re too ambitious, so we make excuses not to do them.
- We’re forgetful, so we forget to do them.
If they’re easy and inspired by your environment, you’ll start building a new habit. Try it. It’s much more fun than making excuses.